When children are grown and are now out by themselves, having acquired their very first job and are already living in their own apartments, a parent is always hoping they trained them enough to: think on their own, drive a car, respect authority, make dinner, hold a job, pay bills and maintain loving and respectful relationships. Parenting is and has always been a huge job: behaviour adjudicator or being a child’s ATM is not adequate.We require a relationship where we can tell our children it is not good to beat or bully others and still find out why they did so. We require relationships with adequate emotional forces to share dreams, convictions and hopes and ensure they can listen to us when we need them to. We need relationships where our children can believe we can offer them even the most difficult solutions to their problems and adhere to their concerns. We need relationships that comprise of not only respect but also love. The parent-child bond takes intentional effort and wisdom. Paying attention to below points becomes even more important if you are adopting a child and we should look for ways to strengthen your relation with them.I will provide you with encouraging tips that will ensure you build a strong relationship with your child.
Moments arrive when you feel you should ask God to reveal his wisdom over your children’s behaviour and their spiritual lives, and issues they have with their friends. God is a good listener and will always disclose strategies to try or questions to ask. Children are prone to disagree even on the smallest issues. It is also known to be a major source of sibling rivalry. It is important to find out why they are disagreeing instead of offering direct punishment to a wrong doing. Ensure you put your prayers before adjudication.
Infants below the age of eight years spend most of their time on the floor and we should be down there too pretending with dolls, playing games or building block forts. Slither through those embarrassing feeling and meet your children on the ground. Just ensure you do not transition into being their buddy: you are still their parents. You can fix time limits for your child play.
Sometimes whining supervenes and you should time out if need be. Getting into the elder kids lives is different and more difficult. You can decide to watch movies or TV shows with them. Your kids might think you are spying on them but it is best to explain your idea of wanting to hang out with them before actually doing so. Though you may not understand much in what they watch, it best to ask questions about storylines and characters to commence a conversation.
A good relationship can be sustained or improved buy keeping it real with your children. For that we need to take time out for communication rather spending time on our smartphones since this is is also one of the major reasons behind losing connection within families.Your missteps can help your children learn from your errors. They will get to see that no one is perfect. I am sure most of you parents have lost touch with your high school or college friends. Through this, you can teach them that friends come and go, but they should not let a friendship collapse due to grievances and lack of attention. Such personal information could be embarrassing hence showed be relayed privately.
The easiest way to merge with your kids is through eating together as a family; through several activities tend to tamper with meal times as the kids get older. It also has been proven that healthy relationship parent-child keeps the family healthy. Even though the dinner takes a few minutes, you can still discuss the day’s highlights and lowlights. Some of these talks will eventually lead to further conversations. It may be difficult to keep the kids on track hence as a parent you should guide the conversation. Having shared time does not mean you have connected unless you involve asking questions and exchanging ideas.
We as parents have things we like doing on our own. Even if we are not thrilled about it, it is much better than being in charge of disorderly kids. It is best to involve our kids in some of our projects, like painting a wall, as it will provide a platform for connecting with your children.
I am sure most of the projects you do together will transform into delightful memories. It is important to pray and think of the appropriate level of involvement for our kids by their age and experience. The sooner you accept these facts the sooner you discover an enjoyable and an endearing life.
Not only the smaller kids but also the elder ones will enjoy when you frequently act silly. It clearly does not involve embarrassing them in public. Ensure you are having fun in private as it will keep things light and makes you more approachable. So you have a go ahead to make funny faces, sing silly songs, do a goofy dance or talk to the dog.
The closeness of a parent to their children is dependent on the connections you have had with your kids’ right from birth. Fathers can also have more bonding with their kids than the mother. Fathers who take time off from their work, even it is a few weeks, tend to have stronger and closer relationships with their kids on every stage. A family that treasures their newborn is likely to proceed to do so in positive ways that bring you closer throughout their childhood.
It is important to note that all relationships require effort. Good relations with our children do not automatically spring out of anywhere, any more than marriages do. Biology provides us with a head start as we are biologically encoded to love our children. As our children grow older, we are required to construct on that biological bond, or the challenges of our current societies will eradicate it. Children automatically love their parents. The connection can remain erect as long as we do not kick in the teeth.
Trust between kids and their parents commences at infancy when babies want to find out if they can depend on you to pick them up when need to be. With time, your kids will get securely attached to you especially when they require physical and emotional needs. Our trust with our kids grows over time in other several ways: not breaking a confidence, keeping promises and picking them up on time.this makes them comfortable enough to share almost everything and possibilities are they wouldn’t have to lie to their parents and better bridge that gap. We prolong our trust to them by believing in their potentials and expecting the best from them.
The ways to build stronger and durable relationships with your children is within you. Ask God for guidance, and start building connections with your kids today.